Blame is defined by the Oxford Advanced Learners’ dictionary as ‘to think or say that something or someone is responsible for something bad’. The Collins’ thesaurus further adds replacement words such as hold responsible, accuse, denounce, indict, recriminate… Sounds a lot like the Kaita aftermath, doesn’t it?
Yes, I have seen a lot of the statuses (statii?) inveighing against the man and what he did. (which I do not defend, mind) Funny how we all suddenly remember that he’s a northerner. Never mind that that would be the same response no matter where he came from. (Also noticing, not for the first time, how tribalistic we southerners are. But I digress) Never mind that nobody has asked some pertinent questions about the others. Like what were they doing all the while running up and down? How could nine other men fall apart just because one of their number is no more available? (I didn’t even know that Osaze was on the field playing until he was substituted. Go figure.) Yet it is so easy for all of us to blame him while sitting at home on our armchairs tweeting or faceboooking.
Let’s get a little further back to the roots…and I mean Adam – Blamer Extraordinaire. Scripture indicates that Adam was the one God told not to eat the fruit. Eve wasn’t there. Also, Adam knew exactly what he was doing when he ate it. Eve didn’t. And where was Adam anyway when the serpent was ‘toasting’ Eve? When push came to shove however, he didn’t want to admit that he had wilfully done something wrong. So, what does he do? He flings some dirt at Eve hoping it would stick. It does but that doesn’t excuse him and he gets a curse for his pains. For Eve, it’s time to play follow the leader and some dirt sticks to the serpent. That doesn’t excuse her either and she gets a curse too.
Fast forward a few thousand years later to king Saul – first king of Israel. Clear instructions from God. He wilfully disobeys and when he’s called out by Samuel, he blames the people. Until he’s told that he’s lost the kingdom, he insists on his point. Then he repents but too late, God has already moved on.
I often wonder what would have happened if Adam and Saul had just taken responsibility. Different outcomes? Perhaps. We may never know.
Blaming is a natural human condition. It comes to us so easily because it frees us from responsibility. We don’t have to find a solution. This is why people will always seek after spiritualists. These people tell them what they want to hear – they always find someone. The source is never them. This is why it is so easy to sit around and blame the government and the country for what is happening. Once we do that, we no longer have to take responsibility for ourselves and what we do. We are excused from the burden of change.
For me, the pain of staying the same has become greater than the pain of change and I have purposed to take responsibility for myself and change my culture of blame.
Are you with me?